My mother-in-law, Mary, is like a cat. The “nine lives” part (not the eating Meow Mix or using kitty litter part). Unfortunately, she is nearing the end of life #9. She hasn’t eaten or drank anything since Sunday. This isn’t a new happening. Three weeks ago she went a month without speaking and full week with no food or water (I didn’t think that was possible, but she did it). On that occasion, three different hospice nurses told us she wouldn’t live more than a day or two, then after a week in that condition, like a nine-life cat, she snapped out of it.
I walked into the room, not expecting any response, and said, “Hi Mary! How are you doing?”
She replied, “Oh OK.”
Wait. What?
The last week and a half she’s been eating and drinking. She still was not talking much but she’d acknowledge our presence. We took her for ice cream one day. But that all stopped on Sunday. We are back to where we were three weeks ago. No eating. No drinking. Mostly out of it.
Karla has beautifully cared for her folks nearly the entire time we’ve been back in Michigan. Upon moving here in the fall of 2013, we realized that her parents shouldn’t be alone. They moved in with us in the spring of 2014 (Karla’s dad had Alzheimer’s and her mom has dementia). That CRAZY TIME (all caps intended) lasted about seven months. Then they lived in a few different assisted living facilities. Arling was “promoted to glory” in January of 2018. Unless, my cat-like mother-in-law exhibits another life, Mary’s will join him in short order.
No one in Flint has ever seen the “real” Mary. Back at the Reading Church of the Nazarene, she was Sunday School Superintendent, played the piano, sang “specials” and served as the Church Board Secretary. She and Arling were the pillars of that little church.
They were a pastor’s dream. It’s no wonder one of their daughters is a Nazarene pastor’s wife (the best one in my slightly biased opinion) and Karla’s sister, Marla, is a faithful follower too. (You read that correctly. It’s Marla Kay and Karla May. HEALTH ALERT: No comment on their rhyming names or I might be next when the roll is called up yonder).
It’s hard to grieve too deeply over Mary’s impending passing. Mary is ready for heaven. She hasn’t been herself for years. Karla has been saying “good bye” to her mom bit by painful bit. That’s the bad news of dementia, the good news of the Gospel is that Mary’s faith will soon be sight. John the Revelator said “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain” (Revelation 21:4). Imagine that! She will be so much better off in heaven.
There’s a part of me that is jealous. Eternal life with Jesus sounds so good! I understand what Paul meant when he said, “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21). Life here on earth is great and we have plenty of work to do, but heaven? Oh wow… even better. Mary is almost home.
If Arling and Mary could talk they’d wouldn’t have many regrets and only praise for Jesus. No doubt their advice to the rest of us: Live lives in a manner to hear the Master’s words “Well done my good and faithful servant.” Arling and Mary lived such lives. Let’s do that too.
My Two Cent Offering 