Month: May 2024

My Graduation Party PTSD

On By Rob PrinceLeave a comment

As the calendar turns to June, it can only mean one thing: High School Graduation Party Season. It’s a time of year that brings forth a bit of PTSD in me.

When I graduated from Garden City West High School High School (Go Tigers! West is best, East is least!!), my folks threw me a party. We had a picture board (highlighting my senior year afro which should be the reason for my PTSD, but it’s not), a trophy display (second place in the cub scout pinewood derby, among other similarly prestigious achievements) and cake (Sam’s didn’t exist then. My mom and Dunkin Hines provide the cake). It was a grand affair. But my brother, Fred, was unable to attend  because he was a poor seminary student in Kansas City at the time. 

Fred, too poor to travel, but not too poor to help me celebrate, sent a singing telegram from a guy dressed in a gorilla costume. Nothing says, “Happy Graduation” like a singing gorilla, right? Instead of just some stranger dressed as a gorilla, I thought it was my brother, Fred, in the gorilla costume. I thought Fred had lied about not coming home in an effort to surprise me on my happy day.

Now for the PTSD: At the sight of the singing gorilla, not thinking it was a stranger but Fred, I ran and jumped into the singing gorilla’s arms. Once in the gorilla’s clutches (PTSD alert), I quickly realized that the dude singing with the spicy burrito breathe was not Fred. It was a stranger. I was in his arms and like the song from that era, the one-hit-wonder Sérgio Mendes’, classic, Never Gonna Let you go; I thought the gorilla was, in fact, never gonna let me go. He kept singing and singing, all the while hugging me with a King-Kong-like grip. 

If you know me, you know, I am not much of a “hugger.” I hug Karla, that’s about it. I wish I were a hugger, I’m not. Hugs aren’t bad. They are fine signs of affection. I just can’t bring myself to doing it very often. It’s odd. It’s weird. It’s a societal faux pax. For this I blame the gorilla and his never-gonna-let-me-go grip. I’m not sure if I’m afraid of never being let go or never wanting to smell that spicy burrito breathe again. 

Here’s the good news, even though I might not be a hugger, our Heavenly Father is. Like in the prodigal son story, when the boy returns the Bible says, “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him” (Luke 15:20). Our Father is waiting to embrace us. He wants us in His family. No matter where we’ve been or how far gone we are. He longs for us to be home with Him. Best of all, Paul wrote: For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:38-39). In other words, our Father never lets us go (and He doesn’t have spicy burrito breathe). Praise the Lord!

Only 49 USA/Canada Nazarene Pastors Are Under 30— A Few Suggestions to Address the Problem

On By Rob Prince6 Comments

On January 1, 1990 Karla and I packed everything we owned into a U-Haul and drove from Alanson, Michigan (where I had been the youth pastor) to Bad Axe, Michigan. It would be my first church as a solo pastor. I was 26 years old. By today’s standards, I would have been a rarity.

There are 4,331 lead pastors in the Church of the Nazarene in USA/Canada, only 49 lead/solo pastors are under 30 years old. Moreover, just 10.1% of the pastors are under 40; where as 40.1% are over 60.* These statistics lead one to ask several questions:

  • Is God not calling young people into ministry these days?  
  • Are young people not heeding the call?
  • Do would-be, young Nazarene pastors disagree Nazarene theology and polity**
  • What is happening and what will happen when these old pastors start retiring if there is no one to replace them? 

Clearly, the dwindling of young pastors is a problem. What can be done to increase the total of ministers under 40? It begins in middle school, maybe earlier. Here are a few suggestions:

Pastors modeling Christlike behavior. Seeing more young people called into ministry begins with healthy pastors modeling before the congregation a life in the Spirit and a joy in the calling of God. 

Preacher’s talking about the joys of pastoring. Not every assignment is a joy, but faithful pastoring is rewarding. Being able to share the joys new babies in baptism or dedication; experiencing the new birth of a young teenager in Christ; having the best “seat” in the house for weddings; helping families through the rough patches of life; and saying the closing words at the funeral of a saint are the joys of pastoring that cannot be overstated. Good, godly pastors are the best antidote for more pastors.

Parents/grandparents speaking kindly and appreciative of those in the ministry. Much of a young person’s knowledge of the ministry comes from what is spoken about the clergy in their home. Gossip, backbiting and hateful words are heard and remembered by children. Likewise, kind, appreciative words go a long way in establishing a respect for the ministry.

Professors speaking favorably of pastoral ministry. In particular, speaking positively and expressing the need for small town pastor in the college classroom. Many ministry majors have been steered away from pastoral ministry from the horror stories heard in the university. “Small town or small churches are small for a reason,” they’ve been told; “people are stuck in their ways; they won’t listen to a young pastor;” and “a small church will eat you up and spit you out.” Such lessons, while may be true is some cases, but do not help encourage those 30 and under to become small town/small church pastors.

The denomination could offer the elimination student debt for ministers of small churches. Making pastoring a small church more affordable should be a priority for the denomination. Getting creative with funding of small churches is essential. Many churches have unloaded their parsonages in the last twenty years and now cannot afford to pay a young pastor (often saddled with debt) a living full time salary.

Districts setting up small town/small church grants could also assist with making small church pastoral assignments affordable. Districts could set up funds to assist pastors salaries or health insurance costs. This is not a totally new concept. When I was pastoring Bad Axe, the district paid half our health insurance, since the church could not afford it. Similar incentive plans to assist small churches which would help in the recruitment and retention of pastors in smaller settings. Most districts have enough excess funds to afford an incentive program. 

Church members recognizing they have two choices: get younger or die. Choose the former, then do whatever it takes to convince a young pastor to come to the church and then do whatever it takes to support that pastor. Choose the latter, do nothing and watch the church die a slow agonizing death.

Sadly too often young people have been given a negative picture of small churches from bad pastors, gossip in their homes, negativity from some college professors, the lack of affordability and have decided, “Thanks but no thanks.”  Churches must be willing to turn over the keys (and purse strings) to a new generation of pastors; district superintendents must be willing to endorse and support young pastors; and young men and women must heed the ministerial calling or there won’t be a church to turn over to the coming generations. 

*The numbers only reflect lead/solo pastors. There are plenty of pastors who serve as associate pastors in some capacity who are under the ager of 30. Some of them will become lead/solo pastors. Still 49 pastors under the age of 30 seems like an absurdly low number. 

**The argument that 30 and under people have disagreements with our theology and/or politics of many people in the churches seems more antidotal than factual. For example, many young people agree with the church’s traditional Biblical position regarding human sexuality. They don’t support with the all-too-often posture toward those who disagree. They don’t like the anger and hatred spewed. Many love Jesus and the church. 

Conrad’s Celebrating His First Birthday and the Greatest Gift

On By Rob PrinceLeave a comment

My grandson, Conrad, will have completed his first trip around the sun on Saturday. Hooray! Conrad’s first year of life has seen the Michigan Wolverines win a national championship in football and the Detroit Lions play in the conference final. Based only on football, he’s already had a better first year, than my previous 60. This Saturday we will be celebrating year #1.

My son and wife, Alex and Blaire, are throwing a big bash for the occasion. I don’t remember if my parents threw me a “One Year” birthday party for me or not, I suspect they did not. Will Conrad remember the Saturday’s party? I doubt it. Even so, a big group will be there for the happy day!

I’m not sure if there will be a candle for him to blow out or a cake to eat. He’s a Prince, so there had better be ice cream (we Princes love our ice cream). We will probably sing “Happy Birthday to you” at some point. There will be presents to open. If he’s like most kids, he will probably be more enthralled by the wrapping paper, bows and the packaging than the actual gift inside. None of those things really matter, as a grandparent, I will be happy if he is happy.

I’m learning being a grandparent is different from being a parent. I recently read that a mom to her kid says: “You get what you get. Deal with it.”  But that same mom as a grandma says: “Would you like your grilled cheese sandwich cut into stars or hearts?”

It’s true. As grandparents to a soon-to-be one-year-old infant, we want the best for Conrad. Of course, the best, the absolute best, gift is Jesus. More than any gift he will receive on Saturday, we can’t wait for him to receive the gift of Jesus into his heart and life. He’s too young to understand spiritual things. He won’t receive Jesus this Saturday. But one day, one great day, he will have the opportunity to accept Jesus into his life. When that day comes Jesus says that the angels in heaven will be throwing a party for the occasion (see Luke 15:7). I’m not sure that there will be streamers, balloons, ice cream and cake in heaven, but there will be a party!

The Bible reminds us that this life is short. Conrad is at the starting gate; I’m eyeing the finish line. James 4:14 says, “What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” James’ point, in light of eternity, we aren’t occupying space on this spinning globe for very long. So, make sure you’ve received the great gift, Jesus. The parties on earth are fine (even if the kid won’t remember birthday #1). A much bigger imperative is to make sure that our names are written on the party banners in heaven.

That’s a party you’ll remember and rejoice in for all eternity!

Questions for the Six Nazarene Pastors who are 90+

On By Rob Prince1 Comment

Of 4,331 lead pastors in the USA/Canada Church of the Nazarene, six men or women are nonagenarians. That is not a new sect or denomination. Nonagenarian is not the same as non-denominational. Nonagenarian is a person between the age of 90-99. There are currently six pastors, 90 years or older, who are still active lead pastors in the Church of the Nazarene in USA/Canada. Wow! 

That’s impressive. I’d like to meet these nonagenarians. I have some questions for them. 

  • Have they been pastoring their whole adult life?
  • Is this a second career? A third career?
  • How do they stay relevant?
  • Do they consider those church members in their 60’s as the “youth group”?
  • Were they ordained by Hardy Powers or GB Williamson?
  • Do they ever catch themselves saying, “When I was a kid back in the Great depression…”?
  • At District Assembly do they ask to give their pastor’s report first, just in case they are in heaven before  District Assembly adjourns. (There have been times I’ve prayed to be in heaven before District Assembly adjourns). 
  • Do they call Dr. Jim Diehl to preach a revival so their people can hear from someone younger (Dr. Diehl will be 87 on his next birthday and is still preaching). 
  • The Bible is always fresh, but do they run out of new stories to tell when still preaching in their 90’s?
  • Do they consider anything written by Fanny Crosby as “contemporary music”?
  • When they read Caleb’s self-description in Joshua 14, “I am today, eighty-five years old! I am still as strong today as the day Moses sent me out; I’m just as vigorous to go out to battle now as I was then” (Joshua 14:10-11); do they think, “wait until he gets a little older then he will know…. Blah, blah, blah…”
  • Are they still pastoring because they can’t afford to live on their social security or meager Nazarene pastor’s pension?
  • Have they inquired about the special provision in the manual that states: “If a pastor has been pastoring since before the presiding General Superintendent was born, their church gets a free pass on paying it’s World Evangelism Fund (Note: that’s NOT in the Manual). 

My real questions are: What lessons could they share about pastoring? What’s the secret of pastoring at 90+?

Will I be pastoring when I am 90 years old? Both my parents died at 83. My odds on hitting the 10th decade of my life aren’t good. I’m not going to lie, now that I am in my 60’s I have an eye on retirement (with both boys and more importantly our only grandson living in Kansas City, Karla has her eye on that grandbaby). One day (probably long before 90), I will retire, but I hope to never stop serving Jesus. I want to serve him until he calls me home. Should God Almighty call out, “who will pastor this church?” and I’m still kicking in my 90’s, like those six Nazarene pastoring heroes and Isaiah, I hope I will say, “Here I am send me” (Isaiah 6:8).

Under Pressure? Read this

On By Rob PrinceLeave a comment

On Tuesday I had a lumbar puncture where the doctor inserted a hollow needle into the space surrounding the spinal column in the lower back to withdraw some cerebrospinal fluid. The hope for this procedure was to lower the fluid pressure surrounding my head to below normal levels (without giving me a crazy spinal headache) and relieve my migraines. If this sounds like fun, you need your head examined (ha). It wasn’t fun, and I don’t think it worked. Which is mostly a big bummer. 

Relieving pressure in other areas of life can be difficult to overcome as well. Maybe more so. Students talk about the pressures in school. Thanks to social media these anxieties have substantially increased over when I was in high school and college. Often in the workplace there is pressure to perform, sell or increase productivity. Even within our homes there can be pressure brought on by money issues, trauma, grief, poor communication and so many other factors. There isn’t a needle that a doctor can inject to bring relief in any of these situations. 

In 2 Corinthians, Paul talks about all the pressures the has endured. It’s a lot. Shipwrecks, beatings, starvation, hardships, many dangers and then he writes, “Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches” (2 Corinthians 11:28). He had a lot on his plate in other words. Still he concludes, “I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:10). It’s the same attitude that James encourages us to have when he writes, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds” (James 1:2). 

I’ve yet to counsel a person (or counsel myself for that matter) who is going through pressures and trials who “delight” in them as Paul tells or “considers them pure joy” like James. It’s tough. It stinks. We want to scream or escape or scream while we are escaping. Delight? Pure joy? Fat chance. When in the throes of such circumstances and troubles, is it possible to get to delighting or considering them joy?

Paul and James aren’t saying the situations are easy. Don’t hear that. Trials by definition are “trying.” They try or patience. Try our endurance. Try our attitudes. They can even try our Christianity. The only way to “delight” and experience “pure joy” is to step back and take a bird’s eye (heaven’s eye) approach. See things as God does. Are you still living and breathing? Praise the Lord! Have you managed to keep your attitudes Christ-like thus far? Praise the Lord! Do your friends see you as an example of faithfulness in trials? Praise the Lord! Will a health care provider, fellow student, co-worker, family member or someone else come to Jesus because of your model? Really praise the Lord! Is Jesus, who endured far more than you, getting the glory for your situation? Praise. The. Lord!

Trials aren’t fun. In my case, chronic pain stinks. But if someone, somewhere, somehow, in some way finds Jesus through it—then bring it on! I consider it pure joy! I will be delighting all the way to Glory with my new-in-faith friend! 

If you want to read more about my Chronic Pain journey read this: https://www.amazon.com/Chronic-Pain-Finding-Midst-Suffering/dp/0834132257/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3B926J59O2SDN&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.jocs3EQ9dvvvhGr1Is3mgg.Koms5WFgzLoxXnWgnwFCwKzrt4LIYt7cSlSGesuD3YA&dib_tag=se&keywords=rob+prince+chronic+pain&qid=1715856520&sprefix=rob+Prince+chronic+pain%2Caps%2C154&sr=8-1

If you want to read more about our journey with our cancer friend, read this: https://www.amazon.com/Got-Cancer-Theres-Help-Victory/dp/B0B7HBZYXL/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2ZYGRTITO87H7&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.ioQtZRdY_5o2j6CYF1D4hh71Lp011q3OHYeTgoPXfqPGjHj071QN20LucGBJIEps.6TEFSqW9eWUwz5qwkmFxdCTviUwcEbyI4BxeZ1DhSPY&dib_tag=se&keywords=rob+prince+got+cancer&qid=1715856570&sprefix=rob+prince+got+cancer%2Caps%2C185&sr=8-1

What do Mosques, Buddhist temples and your church have in common?

On By Rob PrinceLeave a comment

We are living in post-Christian America. This is not news. More people mark “none” when asked about their religious preference than ever before. Knowledge of the Bible and acknowledgement of the need for Biblical truth is at an all-time low. People are no more interested in entering a church, as they or even a long time Christian might be interested in entering a mosque or Buddhist temple. 

For argument sake, let’s say a mosque or Buddhist temple was being built on a corner that a fine Christian passes every day. They watch the building getting built. Maybe they even think to themself, “that’s a nice building.” Would they go to jumah (prayer service) in the mosque on a Friday or a gathering at the Buddhist temple?  Probably not. What if there was a big sign out front that said “All are welcome” would the fine Christian go in? Probably not. More than likely, it doesn’t even cross the fine Christian’s mind to attend a meeting.  They just drive on by.

For argument sake, let’s continue to think the fine Christian had a neighbor who is super nice. They’ve had cookouts together. The neighbors are always willing to lend a hand, a cup of sugar and they grab their mail when gone. They are the best neighbors. What if that guy comes to the fine Christian and says, “Hey, we are having a special service at the mosque or temple, I’d love it if you would come. Don’t worry about not understanding things, I will help you and explain everything. If you get uncomfortable at any time, we can leave. No worries. It’s a special day and I’d love to share it with my special friends.” Would the fine Christian go? There is a far more likelihood that they would go to the mosque or temple with the friendly neighbor under those circumstances. Even with no intention of converting, they will go because it was important to their friendly neighbor.

Nonbelievers in Post Christian America think about your church, the way you might think about a mosque or temple. It’s foreign to them. No matter how well kept the building. They aren’t coming in. No matter what is put on the electronic sign in the front of the church. They aren’t coming in. They don’t know the customs. They have questions: Can anyone just show up? Does one need to get permission to attend? They wouldn’t want to offend anyone. It’s foreign to them. As they drive pass your church, it doesn’t even cross their mind to attend a service. But if a trusted friend invites them to attend a church service, they just might come. If for no other reason than curiosity. They know their friend would be with them, answer any questions and would help them. A friend’s invite is what it will take to get Post Christian America population to come to church.

Be that friend.                                                                                                                                                             

Invite that neighbor. 

Allow God to do the rest.

Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect. 1 Peter 3:15

Why I Choose to Stay Nazarene

On By Rob Prince7 Comments

I was saved in a Nazarene church. Called to preach on a Nazarene campground. Sanctified while attending a Nazarene college. I graduated from a Nazarene college and the Nazarene seminary. The Church of the Nazarene is the church who ordained me. My first job with a real paycheck was at a Nazarene campground. Except for a brief time when I was working at a Presbyterian church while in seminary, every paycheck I have received from the age of 19 forward has been from a Nazarene institution (summer intern in college; worked at the library and in admissions while attending college; worked for the Nazarene Publishing House for two years in seminary; and of course pastoring in six different Nazarene churches). If not for the summer intern position, I would not have met my wife (she was transferred to the local airport for the summer, while I summer interned in the church). Both my sons and their wives are graduates of Nazarene universities. All of my siblings and their spouses are Nazarene institution grads. All their kids went to a Nazarene college too. I owe a lot to the Church of the Nazarene in other words. A. Very. Lot.

But that doesn’t mean that I have blind loyalty. Like everyone with even a passing interest, I see the divides within the church. There are various factions within the church—on the far left, the far right and nutty folks somewhere in the middle. I have friends who’ve left on their own accord and others who were pushed out. I know very capable individuals who have been overlooked for leadership positions, while much less qualified people were pushed to the front. Politics, bad theology, nepotism, greed and pettiness have all infected the church at various times. As a global denomination, I see the challenges in keeping unity across international borders. During last year’s General Assembly, I heard gossip from the floor of the assembly and in social media posts and I saw first-hand its malicious undergirding. I see her faults in other words. The Church of the Nazarene isn’t perfect.

Still I am a Nazarene. I love this church. I will work, pray and do all I can to help her. For me that means working in the local church. Doing all I can to enable this local outpost of the Church of the Nazarene to being a bright shining light in its community. In my opinion, it is. 

If you are reading this, you probably know I write a lot. Some golf, I write. But you won’t read me bashing the church I love. You won’t see me hypercritical of decisions made (even decisions I completely disagree with). Why? I have a debt to her. I want to help her, not tear her down. There are ways to see positive change. Condemning or attacking on social media is not one of them. I love the church. I want her better. I want her to remain true to P.F. Bresee’s vision in the footsteps of William Greathouse and Mildred Wynkoop and so many others. I will work toward that end. I hope you stay and will join me. 

I want to live holiness. Working locally. Praying globally. Staying focused. Being positive. Promoting unity. Encouraging others. Loving people. Making disciples. I will be with her to my ending days when a Nazarene preacher prays the benediction at my funeral service.

The Church of the Nazarene is stuck with me. I choose to stay.

National Day of Prayer: Shut Up and Listen

On By Rob Prince1 Comment

Have you ever been in a conversation with an overly-wordy-talker (OWT)? You know how those conversations unfold:

OWT: Hey you, blah, blah, blah, and then I said blah, blah, blah, blah and oh yeah… blah, blah, blah and you know blah, blah, blah…

You: Hi…

OWT: well, I think blah, blah, blah because he said blah, blah, blah also blah, blah, blah, blah blah and I meant to tell you blah, blah, blah…

You: That’s interesting, but…

OWT: No, no blah, blah, blah have you heard blah, blah, blah, and don’t forget blah, blah, blah, blah blah, blah, and who knows blah, blah, blah. What do you think?

You: You could try…

OWT: Of course, blah, blah, blah is better than blah, blah, blah and If you don’t mind blah, blah, blah, when you blah, blah, blah and then blah, blah, blah…

You: Excuse me, but…

OWT: Oh, blah blah, blah really irritates me and blah blah, blah and did you hear blah, blah, blah and I’m going to scream blah, blah, blah…

You: Wait…

OWT: Ok. Good talking to you. Bye 

You: Bye (under your breath) Grumble. Grumble. Grumble.

That’s not a conversation. It’s a monologue. I wonder if that’s how God feels about our time in prayer with Him? Have you heard ourselves pray? Too often it goes something like this:

Us: Dear God, blah, blah blah, and oh my God… blah, blah blah, and don’t forget blah, blah blah, blah, blah, blah, and if you don’t mind, blah, blah, blah, and one more thing… blah, blah blah, and ok two more things… blah, blah blah, and blah, blah, blah, blah and then there’s… blah blah, blah, blah and Aunt Martha’s gout…blah, blah, blah and please, please, please… blah, blah, blah and pretty please… blah and, blah, blah, blah… ummm…  Amen. 

God:  

Of course, I can’t speak for God. I don’t know how the Almighty responds to the too wordy, one sided monologues that we too often call prayer. I just know how I feel when a too-many-words-talker starts bending my ear. Ugh!

Today is the National Day of Prayer. How about trying this… instead of thinking of it as the National-Day-to-Place-As-Many-Requests-to-the-Almighty-As-One-Possibly-Can Day, think of it as the National Listening-for-the-Almighty-to-Speak Day. 

Psalm 46:10 doesn’t say, “Blab on and on and know that I am God.” It says, “Be still and know that I am God.” Maybe we should do that on this day of prayer. Be still. Quiet. Listen. It’s being like Samuel when he took Eli’s advice in 1 Samuel 3:9 and simply prayed: “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.” 

God might be trying to say something to us, but can’t get a word in edgewise. We might be surprised at what the Lord might say if only we’d stop talking and started listening. Slow down. Quiet. Still. 

In other words, (I write this in the nicest way that I can): Shut up and listen!